While sat around the dinner table this evening relating the various stories of our day to each other, after a little coaxing our eldest daughter managed to remember that her day at school had involved more than just “going to school”. A similar malady seems to afflict all children - when quizzed about the fun things that went on during the day, they respond “I can’t remember”.
After a little more thought (and a few more spoonfulls of baked beans), she remembered “we did some stuff about Jesus”.
“Who was he then?”
She rolls her eyes at me.
“Come on - you tell me who he was… why was he special?”
Her brow furrows. She looks at the ceiling. She closes her eyes. She purses her lips.
“I don’t know”.
“Didn’t he do miracles?”
“What are they?”
“Like huge magic tricks”
“Yes - he done lots of big magic tricks.”
“How come he could do magic, and other people couldn’t?”
Mum cheated at this point, and helped her - with a stage whisper - “he was the son of God”.
“How come if you’re God’s son you can do magic?”
She shrugs her shoulders…
I changed the subject to “What’s the book called with all the stories of Jesus in it then?”, and we ended up talking about Narnia through a rather roundabout route - we are reading at bedtime at the moment.
Throughout the conversation I found myself walking a mental tightrope. We send her to a school connected to a christian church because we want their values instilled in her - and because her Mum is christian. I however would not describe myself as prescribing to any religion what so ever.
When she is maybe 12 or 13 I might take the same conversation in an entirely different direction - perhaps “How do you know any of it happened?”. Or “What proof do you have that God exists?”.
For the moment, I humour the beliefs that are being instilled in her. We talked about the “Good Samaritan” story too - and she added that while it would be good to help somebody up if they got thumped, she would also chase after the person who thumped them and bash them - because that would be good too.
“You should never hit anybodyon their own. We try to guide, and we put away our own beliefs, thoughts and faith (or lack thereof) to perhaps remain objective and supportive of the world view they can handle at this point in their life - but at the same time guide them in accordance with the way we wish them to see the world and take part in it.
It’s difficult.